george carlin politicians transcript george carlin politicians transcript

Oh, and I cant finish without recommending the routine Carlin calls his Incomplete List of Impolite Words. Your vote is what determines the direction this Great Ship America will turn. George Carlin was born and raised in Manhattan, New York in 1937 and died in Santa Monica, California in 2008. [wptabtitle]Friends[/wptabtitle][wptabcontent][twitter-feed username=shoq mode=search id=323794037750513667][/wptabcontent] I say that where the military is concern the extent of a POLITICIANS insincerity can be measured by how far around the world our soldiers are stationed and whether or not any of them(POLITICIANS) can pronounce it? That's a friend. So let me tell you something. We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. I have my ideas. Theres a nice campaign slogan for somebody: the public sucks, fuck hope. I dont vote. Anyway enjoy it while it's h. D} 8 &L$` %pPyZnC*ss9Qm^-u~Y]5;D- p?Ds+A$%C"CXU@5M`mO=YK6l[f0xc5j D6C"NMUCDV#[7q&>O!WsDm~ |!=?H^wM $M:w085uk8OaP;,p|Jp@H0 O#NE\f&KXl1DHq0,>b4A !oPfcmxe5)l*1x,g FC[A9u71-tILKA n_B--jxQjB,=oINnh;> R# }bO 7?|`M S(5OdC0#K1EH-Llj[~y' c7ozi=w,PP&e~g$2! *@@Gh!'[G F.r *N-@LoX15XvGA4#Wb_"$,%%8@2% George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote (?) We haven't learned how to care for one another, we're gonna save the fucking planet? Yeah the public sucks. It's supposed to connect you with other people, but it's just a way of avoiding real human contact. Everybodys at the mall scratching his ass, picking his nose, taking out his credit card out of a fannie-pack, and buying a pair of sneakers with lights in them. The Wealthy the REAL owners! THIS IS A RUSH TRANSCRIPT. What's with all the selfies? So Ive made what i hope is a more readable version below, so this classic piece of polemical gold can be shared and understood more widely. He often spoke about his youth in Catholic school and, as a result of his particular schools relatively liberal approach to education, he says, he was given the intellectual freedom to eventually reject the faith. George Carlin was an outspoken comic, known for his brash sense of humor, foul language and controversial views on politics, religion and other sensitive subjects. Well, where do people think these politicians come from? In this paper, I examine George Carlin's stance on . All day long beating you over the head with their media telling you what to believe, what to think and what to buy. A friend is someone who will come over and help you move. Everybody says they suck. ,G0p%:::400-: @%L`n((lax@\0eF,q] \ .P+4 d3;P hnN*S fxsH>XDAA#beae:i5rY3h11(31013a_p_&]37CD\&k2N@TD}. Enjoyed this speech? It is a crisis of confidence', Crisis of Confidence speech - 1979 , Jon Stewart: "They responded in five seconds", 9-11 first responders, Address to Congress - 2019, Jacinda Ardern: 'They were New Zealanders. But I'm sure they will still remove this. STANDS4 LLC, 2023. He pretty much smashed the nail squarely on the head. Two hundred years versus four and a half billion. They'll get it all from you sooner or later 'cause they own this f**kin' place. The only difference is, when I get finished masturbating, Im gunna have a little something to show for it, folks.. American stand-up comedian George Carlin is notable for his long-standing popularity from the early 60s up until his death in 2008. You crowned us', by Toni Morrison - 1988, for Michael Gordon: '13 days ago my Dads big, beautiful, generous heart suddenly stopped beating', by Scott and Sarah Gordon - 2018, Tara Westover: 'Your avatar isn't real, it isn't terribly far from a lie', The Un-Instagrammable Self, Northeastern University - 2019, Tim Minchin: 'Being an artist requires massive reserves of self-belief', WAAPA - 2019, Atul Gawande: 'Curiosity and What Equality Really Means', UCLA Medical School - 2018, Abby Wambach: 'We are the wolves', Barnard College - 2018, Eric Idle: 'America is 300 million people all walking in the same direction, singing 'I Did It My Way'', Whitman College - 2013, Shirley Chisholm: ;America has gone to sleep', Greenfield High School - 1983, Joe Marler: 'Get back on the horse', Harlequins v Bath pre game interview - 2019, Ray Lewis : 'The greatest pain of my life is the reason I'm standing here today', 52 Cards -, Mel Jones: 'If she was Bradman on the field, she was definitely Keith Miller off the field', Betty Wilson's induction into Australian Cricket Hall of Fame - 2017, Jeff Thomson: 'Its all those people that help you as kids', Hall of Fame - 2016, Dan Angelucci: 'The Best (Best Man) Speech of all time', for Don and Katherine - 2019, Hallerman Sisters: 'Oh sister now we have to let you gooooo!' The planet has been through a lot worse than us. endobj But he wasn't always a . Fuck em! All day long beating you over the head in their media telling you what to believe, what to think and what to buy. Conservatives want live babies so they can raise them to be dead soldiers. )'B^E_2yKg&. But, he is wrong here. Its what our system produces: Garbage in. <> The career of comedian George Carlin (1937-2008) spanned five decades, with his first appearance on "The Tonight Show" being in 1962.He was an outspoken, acerbic social critic, and what came out of his mouthcould be shocking or even sometimes vulgar, but often his railings against injustice or stupidity or corruption shone a light on some dark areas as he said things that others would or . "I don't believe anything the government tells me." - George Carlin 02. I dont always agree with everything he says, but I always listen. It presents itself as fairness, yet attempts to restrict and control people's language with strict codes and rigid rules. Shut the fuck up! In 2017, Rolling Stone magazine ranked him second (behind Richard Pryor) on its list of the 50 best stand-up comics of all time. [wptabs style=wpui-mre-basic mode=horizontal background=false] And the worst part is that social media has become a platform for outrage and self-righteousness. ), Stay up to date with the latest Digital Ants Network (DAN) versions in our channel, All of these features are available at no cost to you. And don't get me started on the selfies. (LAUGHS). e d u / e t d / 4 7 1)/Rect[72.0 131.7406 279.0264 143.4594]/StructParent 6/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> The table has tilted folks. This country was bought and sold and paid for a long time ago. And we have the CONCEIT to think that somehow we're a threat? George Carlin does not need my platitudes, but I will still proffer them. You caused the problem. Religion. stream Not in the abstract they don't. His political commentary was scathing and on par with any of the greats, Pryor, Chappelle, Bruce. If you are interested in using one of my images for your website, or if you would like a print, please contact me directly (See the Contact tab). Sure, here's a transcript of George Carlin's routine about social media: "Social media. (LAUGHS). Everybody says they suck. He was also known for his outspoken views on government and politics. First of all, I can see the sun, okay? They don't pass through a membrane from another reality. So I know that a little later on this year, youre going to have another one of those really swell presidential elections that you like so much. ], Your email address will not be published. As for the poor, they tell us theyve lost all incentive because weve given them too much money.[6]. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents( \n h t t p s : / / d i g i t a l c o m m o n s . 194 0 obj Thats against their interests. (6K"F;nyV-()*bt3QgsX;a\IC'h%7. Hendra, a writer and comedian, talks with Rebecca . The Secret News (News ticker sound effect), Type out all lyrics, even repeating song parts like the chorus, Lyrics should be broken down into individual lines. Most of the images you will find here are available for license or purchase. Now hes on the side of law and order, jiu jitsu really: POLITICIAN:WE'RE TRYING TO GET TO THE BOTTOM OF THIS SO WE CAN GET THE FACTS OUT TO THE AMERICAN PEOPLE. It's like a bunch of robots pretending to be human. Better yet, and more ironic, 'THEY TWISTED MY WORDS.' Every time. Full transcript of George Carlin's "Dumb Americans," excerpted from "Life is Worth Losing, his 13th live comedy stand-up special, performed at the Beacon Theatre in New York City for HBO. Two reasons I dont vote: first of all, its meaningless. Such as the PROCESS: POLITICIAN:WE HAVE TO MOVE THE PROCESS FORWARD SO WE CAN IMPLEMENT THE PROVISIONS OF THE INITIATIVE IN ORDER TO MEET THESE CHALLENGES. e d u / e t d)/Rect[230.8867 233.3227 416.9463 245.0414]/StructParent 4/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> But, the Incomplete List highlights his exceptional understanding of, love for, and talent with language, sound, and rythmn. [187 0 R 188 0 R 189 0 R 190 0 R 191 0 R 192 0 R 193 0 R] George Denis Patrick Carlin (May 12, 1937 June 22, 2008) was an American stand-up comedian, actor, author, and social critic. They don't pass through a membrane from "another reality". You got people posting pictures of their food, their pets, their vacations. CHALLENGES! It was during the waning of the Nixon years, where confidence in government was beginning its slide down to the Stygian depths where it rests today; the Vietnam War, and racial unrest, continued to rage on. 0000000016 00000 n Then, as the controversy continues to heat up, he moves to his next level of complaint: POLITICIAN:THE WHOLE THING HAS BEEN BLOWN OUT OF PROPORTION. I don't like euphemisms, or euphemistic language. Follow the link for the full transcript, its worth it, but here are a few choice excerpts: When it comes to bullshit, big-time, major league bullshit, you have to stand in awe of the all-time champion of false promises and exaggerated claims, religion. I mean, have you ever looked at people's Facebook or Instagram profiles? No contest. You enjoy yourselves. Whatever happened WellWell he's about to find out! I'M SERVING THE NATION. It's our undeniably superior (almost god-like) intelligence that made life difficult for us when we were children. %PDF-1.3 Carlin considered conservatives and Republicans the greedy, warmongering class in political ideologies. Video Transcript - In Defense of Politicians (George Carlin, 1996) "Now there's one thing you mighta noticed I don't complain about: politicians. Fuck hope. And the more noise there is, the harder it is to hear anything worth listening to. Garbage out. A lot of that goes on: QUESTION:SENATOR, HAVE YOU SOLVED THAT PROBLEM?POLITICIAN:WELL, WE'RE MOVING FORWARD ON THAT. But here's the thing: you don't need social media to be happy. The politicians are put there to give you the idea you have freedom of choice. New episode of the podcast is terrific. They want more for themselves and less for everybody else, but Ill tell you what they dont want: They dont want a population of citizens capable of critical thinking. George has been quoted as calling this his favourite HBO special of them all due to its continuous flow-on nature and high standard of writing. We'll start with the first three, and I'll use the Roman Catholic version because those are the ones I was fed as a little boy. Two reasons. It's so obvious that it almost goes without saying, but comedians are generally more intelligent and sensitive than the average person. Good honest hard-working people continue, these are people of modest means, continue to elect these rich cock suckers who dont give a fuck about you.they dont give a fuck about you they dont give a FUCK about you. 185 0 obj In April 2004, he placed second on the Comedy Central list of "Top 10 Comedians of US Audiences".The first of Carlin's 14 stand-up comedy specials for HBO was filmed in 1977. Where are all the bright, honest, intelligent Americans ready to step in and save the nation and lead the way? People trying to make the world save for their Volvos. What a great idea. And that's just sad.". And nobody seems to notice. Such a nice touch. Are these fucking people kidding me? Before his death in June 2008, comedian George Carlin spent 10 years working on a memoir, Last Words, with his longtime friend Tony Hendra. His parents split up when he was an infant because his . POLITICIAN:I ADVISED HIM THAT I HAD MADE A JUDGMENT. You know, say, boy, he really . It's a big club, and you ain't in it. This country was bought and sold and paid for a long time ago. trailer We dont have people like that in this country. I know, they say, they say: well if you dont vote you have no right to complain. From people in all walks of life usually the person in question who has committed some unspeakable act. He was regarded as one of the most important and influential stand-up comics of all time. Its called the American Dream,because you have to be asleep to believe it. Then watch the video. It's all just noise. Whenever the issue of term limits comes up, I always tell people the only term limits I'm interested in would be to limit some of the terms used by politicians. I do not own this video. George Carlin - Euphemisms I don't like words that hide the truth. _S@bZ&j{|pQGB0qw_rm+eUr!:J9d j9mLJRL Q3PUn\#MuRJ\ *B6B6x Regarded as one of the most important and influential stand-up comedians of all time, he was dubbed "the dean of counterculture comedians". I just wanna put this thing behind me and get on with my life (CLAPS, LAUGHS). We could see through the hypocracy and illogic of our parents and teachers, but because of our age and size we couldn't do anything about it. 0000001936 00000 n Its never going to get any better, dont look for it, be happy with what youve got. I'm so interesting, I'm so important!'. They own all the important land. Well, not overnight, you cant see the sun at night. [3], Carlin was equally hard on politics as he was on religion. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents(digitalcommons@montclair.edu)/Rect[400.0562 72.3516 527.5898 82.8984]/StructParent 7/Subtype/Link/Type/Annot>> Dst7cSE99`YpOqBp@&+69ykl95-! It covers the most famous 'rant' part of the speech. Something is wrong here. Use section headers above different song parts like [Verse], [Chorus], etc. And then, maybe, put down your phone and go have an actual conversation with someone. Narrow, unenlightened self-interest doesn't impress me. endobj In this blog post, we'll take a look at some of Carlin's most famous quotes on government. ', Illustrator of the Year, British Book Awards - 2018, Tina Fey: 'Only in comedy is an obedient white girl from the suburbs a diversity candidate', Kennedy Center Mark Twain Award - 2010, Sacha Baron Cohen: 'Just think what Goebbels might have done with Facebook', Anti Defamation League Leadership Award - 2019, Greta Thunberg: 'How dare you', UN Climate Action Summit - 2019, Charlie Munger: 'The Psychology of Human Misjudgment', Harvard University - 1995, Lawrence O'Donnell: 'The original sin of this country is that we invaders shot and murdered our way across the land killing every Native American that we could', The Last Word, 'Dakota' - 2016. m o n t c l a i r . George Carlin. Fuck em. m o n t c l a i r . "Political correctness is America's newest form of intolerance, and it is especially pernicious because it comes disguised as tolerance. He said: [There was] a lot of classroom freedomin fact there was so much freedom that by eighth grade, many of us had lost the faith. They want it back so they can give it to their criminal friends on Wall Street, and you know something? This is what we have to offer. Well, we know what they want. 183 0 obj They own you. And theyre elected by American citizens. Incidentally, another way of expressing this sentiment is to say we're sending our young men and women to places the average American can't find on the map. Well off-course not only is it possible its inevitable and thats when he's at his very best and that's when he trots out the really good stuff. But really, they're just regurgitating whatever they heard on cable news or read on some clickbait website. But that would be much too direct! (LAUGHS). Youre just gunna wind up with a brand new bunch of selfish, ignorant Americans [leaders]. And that certain sign that things are closing in: POLITICIAN:WHATEVER HAPPENED TO INNOCENT UNTIL PROVEN GUILTY (LAUGHS). You have no choice! And if we had a list like that, I wouldn't mind that brilliant judge in Alabama displaying it prominently in the courthouse wall. POLITICIAN:WHEN HE RESPONDS TO MY INITIATIVE, I WILL REVIEW HIS RESPONSE, TAKE A POSITION AND MAKE A RECOMMENDATION. "A transcript of George Carlin talking about Social Media" First Response: First Response Certainly! But marital fidelity is a good idea, so I suggest we keep the idea and call this commandment "Thou shalt not be unfaithful." They want your retirement money. From his 1992 (first ever LIVE) HBO TV special "Jammin' in New York", performed in from of 6,500 people at Madison Square Gardens. Overnight I became a sun-worshipper. Apparently, his last ballot was cast in 1972for McGovern. But here's the thing: social media isn't real life. From Life Is Worth Losing. 0000000716 00000 n The more we pointed out the foolishness of our "superiors," the more they kept us down. And just dumb enough to passively accept all these increasingly shitty jobs with the lower pay, the longer hours, the reduced benefits, the end of overtime and vanishing pension that disappears the minute you go to collect it, and now theyre coming for your Social Security money. Never mind the press conferences get the big knife out of the drawer. Their own habitat. Yes, all the words are quite impolite. (LAUGHS). Besides, there is nothing wrong with the planet. 190 0 obj You have no right to complain. However, most of his bile was reserved for conservatives and Republicans. So my advice is this: put down your phone, go outside, and actually live your life. If this is the best God can do, I am not impressed. He was raised an Irish Catholic, even an alter boy, and attended a Catholic school until the age of 15, when he dropped out of school.[1]. But theres a reason. And don't even get me started on the whole idea of 'friends' on social media. Tired of that shit. They are us', Address to Parliament following Christchurch massacre - 2019, Dolores Ibrruri: "No Pasarn!, They shall not pass! When they're in trouble, their explanations usually begin simply with words like MISS-COMMUNICATION; QUESTION:WHAT DID YOU DO WRONG, SENATOR?POLITICIAN:WELL, IT WAS A MISS-COMMUNICATION. 0000001412 00000 n It would seem to fly in the face of that other rhetorical standby that: POLITICIAN:THE AMERICAN PEOPLE ARE LOT SMARTER THAN THEY ARE GIVEN CREDIT FOR. 0000001596 00000 n Given the nature of our current Administration, I thought it timely to revisit what George said years ago (Back In Town HBO Special, 1996) about American politicians and the American people who elect them. But just as pressure and heat transform coal into diamonds, it's that frustration, social pressure and the heat of anger that transforms us into comedians. They [Catholic teachers] would fall back on, Well, its a mystery.[2]. And you don't want to spend your real life chasing after digital validation.". MISTAKES WERE MADE, DON'T LOOK AT ME, PROBABLY SOMEONE IN MY OFFICE. I dont vote. Carlin took a liberal stance on most things, but generally found politics and politicians corrupt and ridiculous. Read it first. We're all becoming like Goldfish, swimming around in our own little bowls, looking at the world through a curved piece of glass. And the problem is, we're comparing our real lives to other people's highlight reels. endobj This is the best we can do folks. `XX /;VU}`M%VO #5Zfb-> Obedient workers, people who are just smart enough to run the machines and do the paperwork. 0000080920 00000 n endobj 0000004120 00000 n He spoke about his book "Brain Droppings" and answered questions submitted by the audience. Because if its really just the fault of these politicians, then where are all the other bright people of conscience? You know what they're interested in? But the POLITICIANS, god bless them or something like that, they're are at their most entertaining when they're are in trouble. THE FOOD IS GREAT BUT PUBLIC SERVICE IS TERRIBLE. Very relevant for these times of high public paranoia about Global Warming! He was a frequent performer and guest host on The Tonight Show during the three-decade Johnny Carson era, and hosted the first episode of Saturday Night Live in 1975. document.getElementById( "ak_js_1" ).setAttribute( "value", ( new Date() ).getTime() ); All photographs on this website (unless otherwise indicated) were created by and are the property of Daniel R. Joder and may not be used for any purpose without permission. Unless we think of some way to fight back. They want your retirement money. He was a spiritual atheist as an adult. It's like, 'Hey, look at me, I'm having a good time. While you're here, we have a public discord server. If you vote, and you elect dishonest, incompetent people, and they get into office and screw everything up, well you are responsible for what they have done, YOU caused the problem, you voted them in, you have no right to complain. Here Is What You Support, Stop The Steal! They're your 'likes'. All across this great land of ours, the greatest nation on earth, the greatest nation in the history of the World and in times of military crisis you can be sure that someone in a suit in this town will eventually plant himself in front of a camera and carry on a great deal about the most powerful nation on the face of the earth. <>/Border[0 0 0]/Contents( \n h t t p s : / / d i g i t a l c o m m o n s . %%EOF He discusses political stance and also societal beliefs on the environment, and the Earth's resilience towards bombardment by pollution. Carlin was brought up Irish Catholic but grew into an outspoken atheist. Pfft! Beep Boop, this was generated by by ChatGPT. Nobody cares. This is said with a straight face although it's obvious of course that the proposition is stated precisely backwards (LAUGHS). %PDF-1.7 % . It's like a highlight reel of their fake lives. The PEOPLE are fucked. Pfft! George Carlin returns to the stage in Life is Worth Losing, his 13th live comedy stand-up special, performed at the Beacon Theater in New York City for HBO. Here it is: Why are there ten? Schedule . George Carlin was known for his insightful and humorous observations on modern society, including his thoughts on social media. George Carlin > Quotes > Quotable Quote (?) Required fields are marked *. But hey, I guess it's just part of my glamorous jet-setting lifestyle.'. Theyll get it all from you sooner or later cause they own this fucking place! The truth is, obedience and respect should not be granted automatically. The planet has been here four and a half billion years. 191 0 obj But, listen to Georges delivery in the video and it comes across much more as stand-up humor. People like to twist that around, I know. Famous Quotes by George Carlin about Politics. I mean, why do we need to see some idiot eating Tide pods or jumping off a roof into a pool? (LAUGHS) And we know this must be true because the next thing we hear from him is: POLITICIAN:I JUST WANNA PUT THIS THING BEHIND ME AND GET ON WITH MY LIFE. That doesnt help them. He often commented on contemporary political issues in the United States and satirized the excesses of American culture. I think what we really need more of is ritual suicide, you know. They dont want people who are smart enough to sit around a kitchen table and think about how badly theyre getting fucked by a system that threw them overboard 30 fucking years ago. Here's a transcript of a segment where he talks about it: "Social media, what a crock of shit that is. He said: Once you leave the womb, conservatives dont care about you until you reach military age. 0000082419 00000 n Comedian George Carlin addressed members and guests of the National Press Club in Washington, DC. I, on the other handwho did not votewho did not votewho, in fact, did not even leave the house on Election Day, am in no way responsible for what these people have done and have every right to complain as loud as I want about the mess you created that I had nothing to do with. Compared to the people, the planet is doing great. 189 0 obj Then youre just what theyre looking for. endobj Everybody says they suck. Now having somewhat successfully established my Press credentials and because you and I have at-least one thing in common which is that all of us deal with language all the time, I thought it might be nice today for me to come to you with some of my language complaints, certainly not to blame them on you, although off-course youre implicated. In fact at this point he might even say: POLITICIAN:I'M WILLING TO TRUST IN THE FAIRNESS OF THE AMERICAN PEOPLE. Mr. GEORGE CARLIN: Here's another slogan you run into all the time "God Bless America." Once again, respectfully I say to myself what the (beep) does that mean. (LAUGHS), so instead they ADDRESS the PROBLEM (LAUGHS). They say, Well, if you dont vote you have no right to complain. But wheres the logic in that? That's always a nice touch, American people. Subreddit to discuss about ChatGPT. Carlin was noted for his black comedy and reflections on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and various taboo subjects. 0000053233 00000 n Very relevant for these times of high public paranoia about Global Warming! What? @Z(dXSm !4I By the way, its the same big club they use to beat you over the head with all day long when they tell you what to believe. Its what our system produces. I'M NOT SURE; I HAVEN'T DETERMINED THAT YET (LAUGHS). Theres a reason. Dog, Cat, Thinking. Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. So, the next time you're walking around looking at your phone, tweeting and Instagramming and Facebooking, just remember this: you're not living in the real world, you're living in the digital world. You voted them in. George Carlin: How you doing? If it's a really serious matter, they make a JUDGMENT: POLITICIAN: I HAVEN'T MADE A JUDGMENT ON THAT. And they're all looking for that instant gratification of likes and followers, like it's some kind of digital high-five. Marc Allan: Hi. endobj And there you have it, a transcript of George Carlin's take on social media. You enjoy yourselves; itll be a lot of fun. Nobody cares what you had for breakfast, or what your cat did, or what your opinion is on the latest political scandal. Maybe something else sucks around here like: THE PUBLIC. I don't words that conceal reality. Everybody complains about politicians. (But First, Answer Me This). Forget the politicians. Carlin is usually spot on. You got people walking around bumping into each other, looking down at their phones, tweeting, Instagramming, Facebooking, like they're all little paparazzi. Its a big club, and. As long he included one additional commandment: Genius is the ultimate source of music knowledge, created by scholars like you who share facts and insight about the songs and artists they love.