Laura Lee Winslow: That you'll never go into outer space again. Harriette, THERE IS A CAR IN THE LIVING ROOM! Steve Urkel: You know, every time you laugh you burn off three and a half calories? The lovestruck genius of Steve Urkel. Harriette Winslow: Carl Winslow, this is the most insensitive, unromantic gift I have ever received. Laura: Girl, have you ever seen the hair salon so crowded? Steven Quincy Urkel: I wasn't the one who overslept, Ms. Rip Van Winslow. Steve Urkel: Boyd whipped Eddie. Eddie swoops in and starts taking pictures]. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: [sympathetically] Eddie, Carl was just about your age when he lost his dad. OGD now knows the police aren't enemies]. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Yeah, I went to sleep and Stevil made a guest appearance. Harriette Winslow: What's wrong with that? Eddie: Name's Eddie Winslow, but my friends call me Eddie. Laura Lee Winslow: That's right, I don't know, and I still like the Cards. You're taking me out for dinner at Chez Josephine's. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: It was on his tongue! Laura: I mean it, Waldo. Steve Urkel: No, well, actually it's my Uncle Ernie's hearse. Harriette Winslow: So Oona how are things in Altoona? I've been there a 100 times, but this time was different. and-so-the-balance-shifts-blog. If all you ever look for is the float with Miss America on it, then the whole parade is going to pass you by. I was on the bus on the way to day camp when all of a sudden my eyes started to water and I started coughing up all this green stuff. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: [driving off] Would you relax, Steve? Edward 'Eddie' Winslow: [laughing] Good one, Myrtle! Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Would you shut your filthy mouth! Because, I already told him I do remember him. This causes Steve, Waldo and Weasel to leave and Eddie laughs nervously]. You're late for class. [He leaves and minutes later Urkel is playing Danny Boy on his accordion]. Rachel Crawford: Steve, are you sure you're okay? Why, I guarantee you he has studied the best! No one's ever called you 'shrimp'. The truth is you deserve a kiss. Cool. Steve Urkel: I had my first allergy attack when I was nine. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Way to go Carl! Steve Urkel: Why, sure! Steve Urkel: [Steve is suing Carl on the TV show Citizen's Court and Waldo has been called as a witness] Waldo, how did you feel about Pablo? Waldo: Excuse me, but I don't wanna hear about a bug's sex life. Lt. Murtaugh: No, because I brought him back. Carl Otis Winslow: You know you were rude to that guy, Harriette. See more ideas about steve urkel, humor, urkel. [Eddie agrees as Mother Winslow and Harriette walks out of the living room]. [kisses Laura] Love you. Carl Otis Winslow: Edward, why can't you manage money like your brother, Steve? [smiles]. Pick a general observation about her personality. Steven Quincy "Steve" Urkel. Harriette Winslow: And you meant every word 8 years ago. Come here, let me give you some sugar. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: You remember our flyer party, the one that I'm clearly on record as totally aganst. Steve Urkel: Oh yeah, just last week, she actually telephoned me in the middle of the night. Rachel Crawford: I'll just take your word for it. So you have to make every minute count. Laura and Judy, divide up the rest between Barbie doll fans and Lego lovers and get them upstairs too! Why that low-down-cheap-bunder-headed-mud-slinging-bush-wacking-slanderous-snake-in-a-skirt is blackmailing you! Me and the guys were going to have a flyer party next Saturday when you go out of town. As played by Jaleel White, the ultra-nerdy teenager with his whiney voice, awkward walk, pants rolled up high, and apprehensive catchphrase "Did I do. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: The refrigerator. An illustration of a horizontal line over an up pointing arrow. Steve Urkel: Okay. I just spend two hours talking a guy off a ledge, then found out he was a window washer. He's gonna drive us tonight. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: As long as you're up, bring me a piece. Laura Lee Winslow: If you're really my guardian angel, where're your wings and your harp? Undaunted, Steve switches the station to polka music and ends up having a good time dancing with Waldo and Maxine], Carl: By the way, thanks for letting me use your chamber, Stefan. You made me so nervous that I had to go to the hospital to get the thimble taken off. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Waldo! steve urkel pick up linesaiken county sc register of deeds steve urkel pick up lines Look how big and thick it is! Old money has more wrinkles! Allison: Look, we're just having a little harmless fun. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Well why don't you take the guy's next door? Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Dad, when are we leaving? Steven Quincy Urkel: Don't interrupt me! Look I clued everybody in. [runs upstairs]. Harriette Winslow: Now let me get this straight. Dadadadada! Steve Urkel: Oh, I see. Trying to cover it up would only make it worse. Well if he does it again, I'm gonna grab his bellows and make a wish. Laura Lee Winslow: How fast are we going now? I felt like I was one with the Bee-Oh-Sphere. Steve Urkel: No, but it was moving kinda fast. Kanye West name-dropped "Family Matters" star Steve Urkel on his My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy track, "Dark Fantasy." However, Ye originally thought a similar line rapped by T-Pain was "corny," the "Buy U A Drank" singer claims.. As reported by HipHopDX on Tuesday (Sept. 7), T-Pain says Ye stole the concept for the Urkel-referencing line after hearing a similar lyric on his . From 1989 to 1998 (via IMDb ), White . [after Steve's Urk-yeast exploded all over the room]. Originally slated to have been a one-time only character on the show, he soon became its most popular character and gradually became its protagonist.. Steve is the epitome of a geek/nerd, with large, thick eyeglasses, flood . Richie Crawford: We're going to play with these toys for 30 days and return them, like Uncle Carl's going to do with his peanut helmet. She just slipped and I caught her. Steve Urkel: Could. Laura: So do you Max, guess what, Steve rented us a limo. Eddie: [chuckling] I know this one! Jaleel White had a very busy handful of years in the '90s. Laura: Yeah. Waldo: I got close once. [Puts his jacket on and heads to the Door], Waldo Geraldo Faldo: I may get F's, but, by God, I earn them! When are you going to the store? How much do I owe you for parking? And, he's got something that he didn't have before. Laura Lee Winslow: [Urkel voice] Seasons Greetings, Winslows! Steve Urkel: No, I don't like to disturb anyone. Steve Urkel: Ready, my sweet? Steve Urkel: Hi everybody! Carl: I am not. Now I know, I'm not worthy of you- but I love you more now then I did then- Laura Lee Winslow- will you marry me? Oh, good. Ms. Steuben: Steve, it's not a good sign when you have to give your bread a pep talk. Lionel: Really? Laura: [Curtis is about to break bad news to Laura] Curtis! Sorry. Steve Urkel: [Steve picks up the cord to the satelite dish] Sloppy, Sloppy, Sloppy! Midway through the first season, the show introduced the Winslows' nerdy neighbor Steve Urkel (Jaleel White), who quickly became its breakout character and eventually the show's main character. If there was one thing I thought the show could have brushed up on, it would be the premise of the episodes. [Pulls him into a hug]. Baby Girl: You couldn't push me out of this park if you wanted to! Steve Urkel: By any chance, is that something you enjoy? Yesterday he said 'get lost, Fido Face!' Our limo awaits. Carl: Son, I am no neophyte when it comes to electronics. Steve looks at Laura], [At The Winslow home in the alternate world]. Stefan Urkelle: Where did you learn all that? Lt. Murtaugh: Keep the pace, Mr. Backwards Hat! This library card is proof that ONE person can make a difference. Wha? It seems the guy that you purchased your stereo equipment from didn't want you to fill in any important paper work. [Carl has just gotten wind of Eddie's plans to have a flier party. Chuck is twice the man, Raoul is. She xeroxed it over and over and over and over and [Steve covers his mouth for one second. Carl, you given me a half-eaten box of candy. Steve Urkel: Practice. But just to be sure, I'm going downstairs to check the dictionary. Steve Urkel: What? So to see if he can find the best, Steve challenged a few men to put their usuals to the test!SUBSCRIBE to get t. Did you think of me while you guys were camping? Laura: By being born first. I'm getting dizzy. You refuse to go out with me for the last decade! Carl Otis Winslow: You look horrible. Played by Jaleel White, Urkel joined "Family Matters" at the end of its first season, which one of his castmates says was a production decision that changed everything. Carl Otis Winslow: Alright Harriette, you were a liiiiiiiittle abrasive tonight. Aunt Oona: Well not good, my kitchen exploded. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: But you can't fire Waldo, he's our friend. Steve Urkel: King me. Laura: Steve, I know it's a lot to ask, but I'd really appreciate it if you'd tutor Todd. Harriette Winslow: [Eddie got pulled over by the cops, and a ticket] What was the problem? He created a machine that could cause items to grow in size. Harriette Winslow: Abrasive? Steve Urkel was the breakout character for the hit Friday night ABC sitcom "Family Matters" while Jaleel White who played him was the show's breakout star. Steve Urkel: Edward this stuff's been hawked. Eddie Winslow: [at the frat party] Steve, why are you wearing a toga? Or are they just lame? Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: No. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Allison, is that true? [faints]. "Take out the trash, Edward." Laura: For the last time, Steve. Boyd broke my glasses. Why would somebody do this to me?' Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Carl and his father planned on doing a lot of things together, but they never got the chance. People stopped and starred, called me names, and some even spit at me. Newsflash, Eddie! Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: What're you so happy about? Reading, 'Riting and Racism? It was the most terrifying five minutes of my life, second only to watching Lord of the Dance! Then there's in the summer, when we use him as a human bug zapper. Your eyes are like the ocean; I could swim in them all day. It's a cool chamber. Carl Otis Winslow: I know. Cop: You two are going to juvenile hall until your parents pick you up. I may get F's, but, by God, I earn them! A spin-off of Perfect Strangers, the series revolves around the Winslow family, a middle-class African American family living in Chicago, Illinois. What's up? Carl Otis Winslow: [fishing for the catch of a party Eddie wants to go to] Are his parents going to be there? You think I'm fat. Laura Lee Winslow: No! Steve Urkel: Oh, Gosh golly, Jeepers Creepers. Waldo Geraldo Faldo: O.k., but I'm not Home. Carl: Harriette, there is a car in the living room. Laura Lee Winslow: You couldn't check out a book? Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: How'd that happen? I'm starved. Steve Urkel: Don't panic, my love! Stupid? 4 Mar. "Tomorrow, Dad!" Waldo: Life is short, and so it Gary Coleman. While he was starring in "Family Matters" as Steve Urkel, White also began a side hustle as another staple of the era's popular culture . Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [Waldo heads into the kitchen as Steve emerges] You o.k., Eddo? Second question. There's a lot of bad pickup lines out there. [Steve is in the kitchen recovering from Laura and her sock stuffed b*obs. [picks up a single serving container of gross looking food in the cafeteria]. Laura Lee Winslow: Did they let you take one? Was I about to take the Big Sleep? And I know that baseball card meant a lot to you. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Failure to signal. I'm in college. Steve Urkel: Ssssh, not while I'm pouring. Carl Otis Winslow: Better, I locked him up. Steve Urkel: That's because you don't know what it's like being small. The hot chocolate will be ready soon. And you got LOUDER every time you made the Maitre D move us to another table. Carl Otis Winslow: Well I talked to your boy Squeeze and he won't be bothering you for a long time. Steve Urkel: And I'm Steve Urkel! Carl Otis Winslow: Harriette, they applauded when we left. Carl's first word was Donut. This is fantastic! Allison: Well then you better find some new friends, or you better plan to join a different sororiety. Steve Urkel: I can't! Could you write that A down on a piece of paper? Should I be getting some Handi-Wipes? I don't *ever* want to work for you again. Alex Phillips: How 'bout you put your money where your mouth is. Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: How could you mess this up? Aunt Oona: The water main snapped when the roof collapsed. [just got lemon tart filling thrown at him]. Carl Otis Winslow: Yep, Benjamin Banneker. Robber: [holding up the convenience store where Carl, Steve, and Urkelbot are undercover, threatening Carl with a gun] You! "Tomorrow, Dad!" Laura: Maybe not, there has to be some guy who doesn't have a date. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: You mean, you want to kiss me? Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Well, how did you miss it? Steve Urkel: [opens the back door] Surprise. Steve Urkel: I have to tell you, Mr. Winslow. Steven Quincy Urkel: [Grabs a blanket and a pillow and heads to the bathroom only to rush back out seconds later] No! Cornelius Eugene Urkel aka OGD: Serious. Carl Otis Winslow: Well guess what Harriet, it's not empty. My parents would only take Steve if Steve's parents promised to take me. Refresh my memory. But I recognized him right away. Could you write that 'A' down on a piece of paper? Harriette Winslow: You eat all that ice cream and you can kiss your diet goodbye. right next to the bathroom. You know you'll never reach it, but you have to keep trying. Wow, are you wearing a bra? Would you reward me with a kiss? Carl Otis Winslow: Ohohoho and they are personal and private. Steve Urkel: All right! Steve Urkel: Oh, I'd better lock it then! You have a lot of qualitites girls really go for. Get down from there! Laura: Well, he's all yours, Eddie. . Grab a blanket and go sleep in the bathtub. Carl Otis Winslow: There was an E.Coli scale in the chocolate and I tasted a few to make sure the box was safe. Web. [Handing out] Menu, menu, menu, menu, menu. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Wrong, cummerbund breath. Steven Quincy "Steve" Urkel: Fuffner, I've heard of some low things in my time, but forcing Laura to go to the dance with me is plain dispicable. Five hundred on the line. Steve Urkel: Well, I didn't have one. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [to a sorority girl] That dress is so tight! How would you like it if I put Jheri Curl in your deodorant? Carl Otis Winslow: I recognized him right away. Waldo Geraldo Faldo: Uh, uh isn't this the Zorro audition? Rachel Crawford: Thanks Steve. She's mine! Laura: What you did for me tonight was really special. The only reason I asked you to be my partner was because I was worried about my grade. Steve Urkel: I hurt myself. Oh! Like a moth to a flame. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: [voiceover, as Johnny Danger] So there I was, staring death right in the face. Not name your state. Steve Urkel: I've invented nuclear batteries. Steve Urkel: You teach us more than just things out of a textbook. Steve Urkel: Well, isn't that just a FIIIINE kettle of fish? I've had more food than this stuck in between my teeth. Steve Urkel: Look, I know the pay is lousy, the hours are long, and you hardly ever get the credit you deserve. Carl Otis Winslow: I'll get that, you must be having a rough day. Steve Urkel: Why, to make everyone think that the woman I love actually loves me back? Rachel Crawford: Little Richie spoke his first word. Do you have any idea how much you changed him? He couldn't cover his head with his hat. Edward 'Eddie' Winslow: Then how 'bout a nice juicy thigh? Whem I'm unhappy about something, I say so. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: March 24th, Raoul's houseoat is beautiful. I rushed her to the emergency room and the doctor said she has walking pneumonia. [Comes in the lving room with Mother Winslow as Eddie is taking his frustrations out on his sack of dirty laundry because Carl has just taken Waldo to the Chicago Bulls game instead of him]. Uh, Curtis. [He and his partner grabs Willie and Waldo]. Laura: Ma, the package said to cook it at 275 for 20 minutes. Stefan Urkelle: Oh no, I didn't shut off the machine on time. Harriette Winslow: Carl, I save every card you give me. Carl Otis Winslow: But, apparently you seem want to learn it the hard way, well so be it. Excuse me Waldo, is there something written on your arm? Clean up your room Edward. Edward 'Eddie' Winslow: [not knowing Steve and Laura saw each other naked] All right, chicken. I couldn't turn right around and refuse to go out with him. The valet gave me a tip. Chico! Robber: Oh yeah? Steve Urkel: Well, it starts out with a little cough. At the airport he picked up 6 bags. And most of all, you don't have to deal with bullies. Carl Otis Winslow: Well there's no rush. Lt.Murtaugh: Do you know that woman Winslow? "What has 132 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? Laura Lee Winslow: Did you get any sleep? If you were a vegetable, you'd be a 'cute-cumber.'. Not bells, Swiss Melody Chimes. Carl, Eddie: [after Carl gets shocked from the electrical current] STEVE! Steve Urkel: [whispering] I bent my dagger. Carl: Okay, you read the instructions, while I add all the pieces. Check it out: Urkelbot: [Dirty Harry Impression] Go ahead, punk! Edward, sure I got a moment. Carl Otis Winslow: Oh nothing, never mind! Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: L means lousy. I was kickin' butt. You had an accident. White, known for playing Steve Urkel on the 1990s sitcom "Family Matters," is. Waldo: Don't do it, Urkel! Waldo Geraldo Faldo: Well I for one am appalled. Waldo Geraldo Faldo: [talking to Chondra in the bar about Maxine] Aww, yeah, she's a sweetheart but if she caught us in here together she'd rip off your arm and beat me with it. On the way to the Sizzle Club, I took a little detour to the precinct. Raoul is the new produce manager. Harriette: [still unsympathetic towards Eddie's selfishess] Fair? Carl: You know, the only thing worse than not catching any fish is hearing you sing about it. Steve Urkel: Did I mention my dad knows Wayne Newton? Carl Otis Winslow: No. Steve Urkel: I don't have to take this! Steve Urkel: Sh-she touched me, Carl! What bright side, Weasel? Carl: What? Laura: You know, I just don't get why people are so afraid of our history. They help move along our sentences. Carl: There is a guy on our couch who says I remember him, but I don't remember him. Harriette Winslow: [pulls up a chair] Sit down, Carl. Steve Urkel: [runs back into the living room] Sorry Rachel! Laura: Well you're stubborn, irritating, loud, obnoxious, pushy, clumsy Steve Urkel: Hi everybody! Cornelius Eugene Urkel aka OGD: That's big talk coming from a guy in Italy. Cassie Lynn: Look, Becky Sue. April 24th, Carl, I planted this fake diary because I knew you'd read it. *You're* gonna sleep in the bathtub! this is when Urkel was the funniest, when he was youngest, seasons 1 & 2. Laura Lee Winslow: [Laura grabs Steve and his clone on their ears] Okay, let's take a moment and figure out what we learned here. My mom's the one who really messed up. In fact, do you know what it is Harriet? Edward 'Eddie' James Arthur Winslow: Well it wasn't funny. And, I just wanted to wish you good luck. Muskrat Time! Steven Quincy Urkel is a fictional character on the American ABC/CBS sitcom Family Matters, portrayed by Jaleel White. At a party, once, he clamped cables to his earlobes and jump-started a Volkswagen. Estelle 'Mother' Winslow: Oh that's sweet, what did he say? What's for dinner, milk and cookies? Steve Urkel: Well, look at his poor, pathetic face. I love my Army. Ouchith! Steve Urkel: Don't we remind you of The Temptations? Steve Urkel: I can't! Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: Laura, I kept this ring in hopes that one day you would accept it. You're my friend. I kept quiet last week and I haven't say anything tonight. It seems the guy that you purchased your stereo equipment from didn't want you to fill in any paper work. Waldo: I said he Hey, you can't trick me! Steve Urkel: Well, actually, this is Eddie's story. Carl: This baby has a remote. I can't think of a single reason not to do this every week. Harriette Winslow: Carl was nice enough to invite you into his game and you've been acting like a jackass. Carl Otis Winslow: Tomorrow. That's the last time I do anything for anybody in this house. Harriette Winslow: [while trying to calm an apprehensive Rachel about leaving Richie overnight with the babysitter for the first time] Rachel, I know it's hard leaving your baby for the first time, but after that it gets a lot easier. You'll never know how much time you'll have together. Just you and me. Please, my little Rapunzel. Hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm, hmm. Just blacked out for a second there! Look, Steve. All the pins look like Laura! That was a love letter to Eddie Winslow from Eddie Winslow. Waldo Geraldo Faldo: Oh don't worry they promised to come back tomorrow. Why would anybody want to kill her? Steve Urkel: Calm down? Laura: Every time we order another course, you bring your chair closer. She lived a long and full life. Steven 'Steve' Quincy Urkel: What's that? Laura Lee Winslow: Most people don't know that. Steve Urkel: To be quite honest, Fuffner; I'd written you off as being incorrigible.
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